{"title":"Holiday","description":null,"products":[{"product_id":"stoner-santa-christmas-card","title":"Stoner Santa Christmas Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eBlank Inside\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Offensive Delightful","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":53466584580468,"sku":null,"price":6.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2025-09-30at7.03.11AM.png?v=1759237404"},{"product_id":"winter-solstice-greeting-card-1","title":"Winter Solstice Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePrinted on 100% recycled paper and paired with a coordinating envelope. Blank inside and sealed in a protective cellophane sleeve. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Boss Dotty","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":53555503595892,"sku":null,"price":6.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2025-11-07at5.38.34PM.png?v=1762562462"},{"product_id":"holiday-gnome-gift-bag","title":"Holiday Gnome Gift Bag","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSize – 8 x 9.5 x 4 inch • Heavyweight Matte Coated Paper • Printed in Full Color • Cotton Rope Handle \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Red Cap","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":53602355085684,"sku":null,"price":7.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2025-11-25at2.10.15PM.png?v=1764105073"},{"product_id":"holiday-moss-gift-bag","title":"Holiday Moss Gift Bag","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• Medium Size – 8 x 9.5 x 4 inch  • Heavyweight Matte Coated Paper • Printed in Full Color • Cotton Rope Handle \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Red Cap","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":53602355872116,"sku":null,"price":7.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2025-11-23at4.08.24PM.png?v=1764009186"},{"product_id":"merry-christmas-asshole-greeting-card","title":"Merry Christmas Asshole Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eYou have to give everyone a card at Christmas, even the assholes. This gorgeous card features some retro inspired red flowers and if you take the time to mail this you're for sure not the asshole. The perfect funny holiday card for your boss, the neighbor who keeps stealing your wifi, your sister, co-workers, the person who parked you in at the grocery store....the possibilities are endless. Lucky for you we have these! Also comes in a box set of 10\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003ePrinted on 130lb paper. Size A2 card measures 4.25\"x5.5\", includes an envelope, and comes wrapped in a protective cello sleeve. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCopyright The Coin Laundry\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Coin Laundry","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":53606884639092,"sku":null,"price":6.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2025-11-22at3.54.08PM.png?v=1763852101"},{"product_id":"hanukkah-greeting-card","title":"Hanukkah Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eThese folded greeting cards are printed on lush\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ematte card stock with vibrant colors. They are blank inside for your message. The cards are paired with brown kraft envelopes and come packaged in a eco-friendly protective sleeve.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dreamfolk Studio","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":53607930593652,"sku":null,"price":6.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2025-11-21at1.55.00PM.png?v=1763758537"},{"product_id":"tell-me-what-you-want-mug","title":"Tell Me What You Want Mug","description":"\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDouble sided print \/ full wrap\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTop rack dishwasher safe\u003c\/strong\u003e. \u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMicrowave safe\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Mugsby","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":53693699064180,"sku":null,"price":15.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2025-11-28at12.48.10PM.png?v=1764359337"},{"product_id":"xmas-cat-card","title":"Christmas Cat Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eYour Christmas gifts are scratching pads and litter boxes meow.  \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDon't bore your loved ones and co-workers with some store-bought mass-produced lameness. These cards are professionally printed on high quality luster greeting card stock and are sure to be the most unique card on the mantel. Each card measures 5x7 inches and are blank inside so that you can truly personalize your message. Every card comes with a matching envelope.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Shady Front","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56431670886772,"sku":null,"price":7.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2026-10-19at1.57.36PM.png?v=1792439871"},{"product_id":"shitters-full-holiday-card","title":"Shitters Full Uncle Eddie Holiday Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eWhat better way to let your loved ones know why\u003cem\u003e \u003c\/em\u003eyou were late to the Christmas gathering.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDon't bore your loved ones and co-workers with some store-bought mass-produced lameness. These cards are professionally printed on high quality luster greeting card stock and are sure to be the most unique card on the mantel. Each card measures 5x7 inches and are blank inside so that you can truly personalize your message. Every card comes with a matching envelope.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Shady Front","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56431674163572,"sku":null,"price":7.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2026-10-19at1.55.11PM.png?v=1792439726"},{"product_id":"candy-can-cutie-under-eye-mask","title":"Candy Can Cutie Under Eye Mask","description":"\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eA refreshing\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003epeppermint\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003etreat for tired eyes\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eInfused with peppermint \u0026amp; hyaluronic acid for the ultimate holiday refresh, these candy cane-shaped eye masks cool and depuff.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5) [\u0026amp;+:not(h3)]:mt-[calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4)]\"\u003eWhy We Love it?\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-[calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4)] list-outside p-0 ps-(--slate-spacing-element-large) list-disc [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;li]:list-disc\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin-top: calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4); padding: calc(var(--spacing)*0); list-style: outside disc; padding-inline-start: var(--slate-spacing-element-large); --line-height: var(--slate-typography-line-height-200); --font-weight-medium: var(--slate-xp_typography-weight-paragraph-medium,var(--slate-typography-weight-medium)); font-family: var(--slate-xp_typography-family-sans-serif,var(--font-family-sans)); font-weight: 400; font-size: var(--slate-typography-font-size-200); line-height: var(--line-height); letter-spacing: var(--slate-xp_typography-letter-spacing-200,var(--slate-typography-letter-spacing-200)); text-underline-offset: 25%; color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; white-space: normal; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003eHyaluronic Acid\u003c\/strong\u003e: moisture-binding to help refresh tired undereyes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003ePeppermint\u003c\/strong\u003e: helps cool \u0026amp; soothe the look of puffy undereyes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003eGlycerin\u003c\/strong\u003e: helps prevent dark circles, puffiness, \u0026amp; dryness\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003eHydrogel Formula\u003c\/strong\u003e: serum-soaked masks cling perfectly to skin\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003eChill Mode\u003c\/strong\u003e: easily stored in the fridge for a cooling, soothing treat\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003eFestive Designs\u003c\/strong\u003e: Mix and match for smile-inducing self-care\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003ch3 class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5) [\u0026amp;+:not(h3)]:mt-[calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4)]\"\u003eWorks Best for Targeting\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-[calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4)] list-outside p-0 ps-(--slate-spacing-element-large) list-disc [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;li]:list-disc\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin-top: calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4); padding: calc(var(--spacing)*0); list-style: outside disc; padding-inline-start: var(--slate-spacing-element-large); --line-height: var(--slate-typography-line-height-200); --font-weight-medium: var(--slate-xp_typography-weight-paragraph-medium,var(--slate-typography-weight-medium)); font-family: var(--slate-xp_typography-family-sans-serif,var(--font-family-sans)); font-weight: 400; font-size: var(--slate-typography-font-size-200); line-height: var(--line-height); letter-spacing: var(--slate-xp_typography-letter-spacing-200,var(--slate-typography-letter-spacing-200)); text-underline-offset: 25%; color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; white-space: normal; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003eFine lines\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003eDry under eyes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003eDullness\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003eDehydration\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003ch3 class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5) [\u0026amp;+:not(h3)]:mt-[calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4)]\"\u003eLet's Do This!\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003col class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-[calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4)] list-outside p-0 ps-(--slate-spacing-element-large) list-decimal [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;li]:list-decimal\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin-top: calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4); padding: calc(var(--spacing)*0); list-style: outside decimal; padding-inline-start: var(--slate-spacing-element-large); --line-height: var(--slate-typography-line-height-200); --font-weight-medium: var(--slate-xp_typography-weight-paragraph-medium,var(--slate-typography-weight-medium)); font-family: var(--slate-xp_typography-family-sans-serif,var(--font-family-sans)); font-weight: 400; font-size: var(--slate-typography-font-size-200); line-height: var(--line-height); letter-spacing: var(--slate-xp_typography-letter-spacing-200,var(--slate-typography-letter-spacing-200)); text-underline-offset: 25%; color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; white-space: normal; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: decimal; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003eApply to undereye area.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: decimal; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003eLeave on for 15-20 mins.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: decimal; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003eRemove \u0026amp; discard after use (one-time use only).\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: decimal; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003eRub in excess serum. Marvel at your fresh glow!\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e","brand":"My Spa Life","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56461071024500,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2026-10-19at1.50.21PM.png?v=1792439479"},{"product_id":"merry-christmas-asshole-dish-towel","title":"Merry Christmas Asshole Dish Towel","description":"\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eMerry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Joyeaux Noel etc etc etc.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eWe have to be nice to everyone this time of year, even the assholes. Super cute modern floral poinsettia\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003ered and green\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ehand screen printed with Earth friendly inks. We love this super fun versatile print for holiday decor in any home! Brighten up your kitchen with our pretty holiday flowers and hilarious snarky message. Perfect for secret Santa and white elephant gifts too!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eMade with soft\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003e100% cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ewith a hanging loop in the upper corner. Measures\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003e30\"x30\"\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Coin Laundry","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56471907402100,"sku":null,"price":18.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2026-10-19at1.48.38PM.png?v=1792439347"},{"product_id":"festive-as-fuck-dish-towel","title":"Festive As Fuck Dish Towel","description":"\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eMake your kitchen look festive as fuck with this cute, retro, vintage-style\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003ekitchen towel\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e- it's sure to add a bit of humor and laughter to your holiday season!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003ePerfect for the person with a quirky side, the Festive as Fuck Kitchen Towel is guaranteed to bring you (and your guests!) a merry 'n' bright Christmas. Featuring red flowers and berries with greenery this festive decor will light up any home!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eWhen you have more than one christmas sweater and start putting up your tree the day after Halloween. Makes a great gift!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eHand screen printed with Earth friendly water based inks. Super soft and absorbent\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003e100% cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003etowel measures 30\"x30\" and is machine washable.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Coin Laundry","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56471909171572,"sku":null,"price":18.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2026-10-19at1.45.14PM.png?v=1792439164"},{"product_id":"festive-as-fuck-card","title":"Festive As Fuck Christmas Card","description":"\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eIf you're out there hanging up lights in September, you own more than 2 holiday themed sweaters, you have mulitple playlists of Christmas music queued up, and you're planning your holiday menus months in advance and the scent of pumpkin spice has become your aura, you might be a little but Festive. The perfect card for all the obsessive decorators!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003eBlank inside\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Coin Laundry","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56471912710516,"sku":null,"price":6.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2026-10-19at1.43.11PM.png?v=1792439031"},{"product_id":"jesus-card","title":"Jesus Birthday Funny Christmas Card","description":"\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eYou expect to get presents and special food and days off of work because it's SOMEONE ELSE'S BIRTHDAY?!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eWow...\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-(--slate-dimensions-5)\"\u003eThis amazing\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003eChristmas card\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eis a hilarious reminder to all those selfish heathens in your life that it's pretty rude to expect cards and gifts and stuff...(unless they want to give you something-that's ok)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul class=\"type-fs-paragraph text-fs-text-primary m-0 mt-[calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4)] list-outside p-0 ps-(--slate-spacing-element-large) list-disc [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;li]:list-disc\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin-top: calc(var(--slate-dimensions-5)\/4); padding: calc(var(--spacing)*0); list-style: outside disc; padding-inline-start: var(--slate-spacing-element-large); --line-height: var(--slate-typography-line-height-200); --font-weight-medium: var(--slate-xp_typography-weight-paragraph-medium,var(--slate-typography-weight-medium)); font-family: var(--slate-xp_typography-family-sans-serif,var(--font-family-sans)); font-weight: 400; font-size: var(--slate-typography-font-size-200); line-height: var(--line-height); letter-spacing: var(--slate-xp_typography-letter-spacing-200,var(--slate-typography-letter-spacing-200)); text-underline-offset: 25%; color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; white-space: normal; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003eMeasures\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e4.25x5.5\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"m-0 [\u0026amp;\u0026gt;p]:m-0\" style=\"box-sizing: border-box; border-image: initial; margin: calc(var(--spacing)*0); padding: 0px; list-style-type: disc; border: 0px solid var(--color-gray-200,currentColor);\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong class=\"type-fs-paragraph-medium text-fs-text-primary\"\u003eIncludes\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eenvelope \u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Coin Laundry","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56471915200884,"sku":null,"price":6.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2026-10-19at1.40.46PM.png?v=1792438891"},{"product_id":"happy-fucking-holidays-greeting-card","title":"Happy Fucking Holidays Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eSend to your favorite fucking people this season.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBlank inside. Envelope included. \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Offensive Delightful","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56534993666420,"sku":null,"price":6.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2026-10-23at6.23.25PM.png?v=1792801455"},{"product_id":"i-see-you-mofo-christmas-card","title":"I See You Mofo Christmas Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eHe see's you, better watch it. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBlank inside. Envelope included. \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Offensive Delightful","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56535030989172,"sku":null,"price":6.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/ScreenShot2026-10-23at6.28.52PM.png?v=1792801751"},{"product_id":"ive-been-watching-you-mother-fucker-decorative-holiday-plate","title":"I've Been Watching You Mother Fucker Decorative Holiday Plate","description":"\u003cp\u003eRepurposed vintage dish with funny graphic. This unassuming, discretely snarky dish will add fun and laughter to your walls.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDish is for decorative use ONLY. Not for food consumption. Dish does come with backing making it ready to hang on your wall.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHandmade and upcycled material. Some imperfections might be visible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e7\" diameter\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Plates","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56557960986996,"sku":null,"price":24.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3195.heic?v=1792953506"},{"product_id":"its-beginning-to-look-a-lot-like-fuck-this-holiday-decorative-plate","title":"It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Fuck This Holiday Decorative Plate","description":"\u003cp\u003eRepurposed vintage dish with funny graphic. This unassuming, discretely snarky dish will add fun and laughter to your walls.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDish is for decorative use ONLY. Not for food consumption. Dish does come with backing making it ready to hang on your wall.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHandmade and upcycled material. Some imperfections might be visible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e7.5\" diameter\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Plates","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56557964231028,"sku":null,"price":24.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3196.heic?v=1792953729"},{"product_id":"silent-night-not-in-this-shithole-holiday-decorative-plate","title":"Silent Night? Not in This Shithole Holiday Decorative Plate","description":"\u003cp\u003eRepurposed vintage dish with funny graphic. This unassuming, discretely snarky dish will add fun and laughter to your walls.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDish is for decorative use ONLY. Not for food consumption. Dish does come with backing making it ready to hang on your wall.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHandmade and upcycled material. Some imperfections might be visible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e7.75\" diameter\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Plates","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56557969342836,"sku":null,"price":24.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3197.heic?v=1792954186"},{"product_id":"happy-holidays-shit-decorative-holiday-plate","title":"Happy Holidays \u0026 Shit Decorative Holiday Plate","description":"\u003cp\u003eRepurposed vintage dish with funny graphic. This unassuming, discretely snarky dish will add fun and laughter to your walls.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDish is for decorative use ONLY. Not for food consumption. Dish does come with backing making it ready to hang on your wall.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHandmade and upcycled material. Some imperfections might be visible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e6\" diameter\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Plates","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56557972914548,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3198.heic?v=1792954299"},{"product_id":"festive-as-fuck-decorative-holiday-plate","title":"Festive As Fuck Decorative Holiday Plate","description":"\u003cp\u003eRepurposed vintage dish with funny graphic. This unassuming, discretely snarky dish will add fun and laughter to your walls.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDish is for decorative use ONLY. Not for food consumption. Dish does come with backing making it ready to hang on your wall.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHandmade and upcycled material. Some imperfections might be visible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e7.5\" diameter\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Plates","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56557973274996,"sku":null,"price":24.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3199.heic?v=1792954380"},{"product_id":"i-dont-believe-in-you-either-asshole-decorative-holiday-plate","title":"I Don't Believe In You Either, Asshole Decorative Holiday Plate","description":"\u003cp\u003eRepurposed vintage dish with funny graphic. This unassuming, discretely snarky dish will add fun and laughter to your walls.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDish is for decorative use ONLY. Not for food consumption. Dish does come with backing making it ready to hang on your wall.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHandmade and upcycled material. Some imperfections might be visible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e6.25\" diameter\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Plates","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56557974585716,"sku":null,"price":24.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3200.heic?v=1792954444"},{"product_id":"i-have-no-fucks-to-give-pa-rum-pum-pum-pum-decorative-holiday-plate","title":"I Have No Fucks To Give Pa Rum Pum Pum Pum Decorative Holiday Plate","description":"\u003cp\u003eRepurposed vintage dish with funny graphic. This unassuming, discretely snarky dish will add fun and laughter to your walls.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDish is for decorative use ONLY. Not for food consumption. Dish does come with backing making it ready to hang on your wall.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHandmade and upcycled material. Some imperfections might be visible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e7.5\" diameter\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Plates","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56557975503220,"sku":null,"price":24.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3201.heic?v=1792954537"},{"product_id":"bitch-dont-kill-my-vibe-its-christmas-time-decorative-holiday-plate","title":"Bitch Don't Kill My Vibe It's Christmas Time Decorative Holiday Plate","description":"\u003cp\u003eRepurposed vintage dish with funny graphic. This unassuming, discretely snarky dish will add fun and laughter to your walls.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDish is for decorative use ONLY. Not for food consumption. Dish does come with backing making it ready to hang on your wall.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHandmade and upcycled material. Some imperfections might be visible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e10.25\" diameter\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Plates","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56557976486260,"sku":null,"price":26.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3202.heic?v=1792954655"},{"product_id":"fa-la-la-la-fuck-this-decorative-holiday-plate","title":"Fa La La La Fuck This Decorative Holiday Plate","description":"\u003cp\u003eRepurposed vintage dish with funny graphic. This unassuming, discretely snarky dish will add fun and laughter to your walls.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDish is for decorative use ONLY. Not for food consumption. Dish does come with backing making it ready to hang on your wall.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHandmade and upcycled material. Some imperfections might be visible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e10.75\" diameter\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Plates","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56557977141620,"sku":null,"price":26.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3203.heic?v=1792954729"},{"product_id":"theres-some-ho-s-in-this-house-holiday-mug","title":"There’s Some Ho’s in This House Holiday Mug","description":"\u003cp\u003e12 ounce ceramic mug.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDishwasher and microwave safe.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Little Piece of My Heart","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56678980878708,"sku":null,"price":15.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3302.heic?v=1793652057"},{"product_id":"i-ll-take-you-to-the-candy-shop-holiday-mug","title":"I’ll Take You To The Candy Shop Holiday Mug","description":"\u003cp\u003e12 oz  ceramic mug.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDishwasher and microwave safe.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Little Piece of My Heart","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56678999785844,"sku":null,"price":15.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3303.heic?v=1793652145"},{"product_id":"best-friend-s-ride-holiday-mug","title":"Best Friend’s Ride Holiday Mug","description":"\u003cp\u003e12 oz ceramic mug.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDishwasher \u0026amp; microwave safe.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Little Piece of My Heart","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56679014367604,"sku":null,"price":15.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/files\/IMG_3301.heic?v=1793652295"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0942\/3814\/6932\/collections\/Screen_Shot_2026-10-31_at_2.34.50_PM.png?v=1793479107","url":"https:\/\/shoplittlepieceofmyheart.com\/collections\/holiday.oembed?page=2","provider":"Little Piece of My Heart","version":"1.0","type":"link"}